Things to Watch in Revisions: Cliches, Point of View

By Mel Jacob
Chats offer a variety of discussion topics and advice, some good, some bad. Two recent discussions raised some useful points. Metaphors and similes can liven up our writing provided they aren't too cute or don't descend into groaners, i.e., too many puns. It's all too easy to write in clichés and not even realize it. Always read your material and eliminate these pesky sayings or consider other ways to say them. Dialogue may be an exception, but don't have all your characters speak this way. One character who overuses clichés is enough.

So, when you discover these phrases, what do you do about them? One writer advises changing one word. With an apt new word, you can create something new and original. Consider as an example: slow as molasses in January. Maybe try: slow as a turgid creek in August. Not great, but you get the idea. Play with words and meanings until you find the best word to suit your material, setting, your character, and the point of view in use.

Another chat with Linda Vernon dealt with point of view in commercial novels. She based much of her discussion on Sherri Szeman's _Mastering Point of View_ (1884910521, Story Press, 2001). Those interested in her excellent presentation should contact Hillwithit@aol.com. An important point to remember: we can have a character aware of actions (smiles, even blushes), but not their appearance unless they are contrasting it with another character's or something in the scene. Vernon also cautioned against confusing the character's perspective with point of view. An example: Opening one red-rimmed orb, (character name) (action). A character can't see his eyes as red-rimmed. Only another character could observe that.

Another aspect of point of view relates to focus: up close and through the POV character's eyes or cinematic, which usually refers more to an omniscient narrator or observer. Ken Follet used this to open _Pillars of the Earth_ before going into a more intimate point of view.

Vernon observed how word choice influences the reader's view of characters. Most villains are described in negative terms using words like: hulking, menacing, devious, isolated, strident, etc. Heroes are described as: honest, loyal, diligent, kind, etc. The words used to describe the character carries the author's view of them, their actions, dialogue, and emotions. Such words can either tell or show depending on whether they represent the POV character's reaction or emotions.

Point of view gives many writers problems so understanding it becomes essential. Vernon has promised to discuss other aspects of point of view in future chats.

Writing Chats on AOL: Obstacles to Writing, Rejection

By Mel DuVall, IWW Administrator

Always remember the knowledge and experiences of the host, presenters, and even attendees limit the content of chats and workshops. The publishing industry is large, complex, and changing to meet new challenges. New technologies make it easier for many to write, but don’t guarantee the works produced will be better than those of the past.

View chats and workshops and all self-help tools and books with a critical eye. Use what helps to improve your own work. Learn to judge quality over quantity. Honing one’s critical skills is an important writing tool.Two recent AOL chats point out this problem. One focused on Obstacles to Writing and another on Rejections. They illustrate the point.

The chat on Obstacles, a popular chat topic, identified some important elements, but also veered off in the later discussion to the experiences of two participants. Some of these latter points remained specific to the persons raising them.

Among the useful points: lack of confidence, overconfidence, lack of knowledge, trying too hard (straining for literary prose or the perfect hook), over-or underwriting of dramatic passages. The consensus: get the story down first and worry about the perfect metaphor later. Once you have a draft, you can revise it. Once the ending is set, the hook becomes much clearer. It also makes it easier to tell when and where to start the piece.

The chat on Rejections veered off into using Feng Shui to decorate a writing office. Useful points emerged, however.

Don’t agonize over rejection. Keep writing and reading books and market news of your genre. While rejection letters might help convince the IRS you’re a serious writer, file them away and move ahead.

In those few cases where an editor sends comments, do your best to understand what they mean. Sometimes, it’s just a way of letting you down easily, but most editors are too busy for idle comments, so read any such responses with care. They may point to needed revisions or story weaknesses. Most offer only a form-letter response or a scrawled ‘no.’

Participants deplored the mergers among publishing houses, but others noted new ones start up all the time. The host spoke highly of e-publishing and e-zines. More of them offer payment or royalties for longer works.