Things to Watch in Revisions: Cliches, Point of View

By Mel Jacob
Chats offer a variety of discussion topics and advice, some good, some bad. Two recent discussions raised some useful points. Metaphors and similes can liven up our writing provided they aren't too cute or don't descend into groaners, i.e., too many puns. It's all too easy to write in clichés and not even realize it. Always read your material and eliminate these pesky sayings or consider other ways to say them. Dialogue may be an exception, but don't have all your characters speak this way. One character who overuses clichés is enough.

So, when you discover these phrases, what do you do about them? One writer advises changing one word. With an apt new word, you can create something new and original. Consider as an example: slow as molasses in January. Maybe try: slow as a turgid creek in August. Not great, but you get the idea. Play with words and meanings until you find the best word to suit your material, setting, your character, and the point of view in use.

Another chat with Linda Vernon dealt with point of view in commercial novels. She based much of her discussion on Sherri Szeman's _Mastering Point of View_ (1884910521, Story Press, 2001). Those interested in her excellent presentation should contact Hillwithit@aol.com. An important point to remember: we can have a character aware of actions (smiles, even blushes), but not their appearance unless they are contrasting it with another character's or something in the scene. Vernon also cautioned against confusing the character's perspective with point of view. An example: Opening one red-rimmed orb, (character name) (action). A character can't see his eyes as red-rimmed. Only another character could observe that.

Another aspect of point of view relates to focus: up close and through the POV character's eyes or cinematic, which usually refers more to an omniscient narrator or observer. Ken Follet used this to open _Pillars of the Earth_ before going into a more intimate point of view.

Vernon observed how word choice influences the reader's view of characters. Most villains are described in negative terms using words like: hulking, menacing, devious, isolated, strident, etc. Heroes are described as: honest, loyal, diligent, kind, etc. The words used to describe the character carries the author's view of them, their actions, dialogue, and emotions. Such words can either tell or show depending on whether they represent the POV character's reaction or emotions.

Point of view gives many writers problems so understanding it becomes essential. Vernon has promised to discuss other aspects of point of view in future chats.

Resources For Writers

by Mel Duval

Resources for writers abound on the Internet. Email, bulletin boards have been with the Internet since its inception. Chat rooms soon followed. Any search engine will provide a long list of writing chat room, just be sure to eliminate sex, singles, and marriage from your search. Most ISPs offer a variety of chat facilities.

For a long time AOL provided chat rooms and host training. In an effort to reduce cost and add other services, AOL cut writing groups loose. Some floundered, some went elsewhere and others continued. The Children's Writing Chat continues on Thursday evenings and multi-published author Brenda Hiatt has her chat/critique group on Tuesday.

Most of the AOL writers wanted to continue and formed a new group AOL Writers and began chats again. They now have an extensive schedule that covers all most all aspect of writing. They have a website at http://www.freewebs.com/writersonaol/weeklychatschedule.htm. Two of the best chats occur on Friday evenings at 8 and 9 pm EST respectively, the Writer's Launch Pad, and the Commercial Novelists chat. They also have begun a new chat on Sunday evenings focused on beginners.

From time to time, I'll provide tidbits from various AOL chats that may interest others. The most recent Commercial Novelist chat covered creativity (or how to get rid of writer's block). Much of the formal presentation by Linda Vernon came from the work of Timothy Perrin with a nod to Writing the Natural Way by Gabriele Lusser Rico. Gary Provost's method using 3 x 5 cards for scene ideas also received mention. Anyone interested in the full presentation can contact Hillwithit@aol.com (screenwriter John Hill) for a log.

While useful for information, techniques, and market news, chats consume a lot of time, time I could spend on writing. Finding and selecting the most useful chats also takes times. I narrowed my list down to a few each week and sporadically add others when the topic interests me. Between my ordinary life and my writing, I haven't time to spend it all in chats, tempting though they may seem. So I share information with others on the chats I find useful, hoping to free some of their time for more writing. The next posting on chats will contain a more extensive summary of the chat content.